I meet so many people in my daily life. I work in healthcare and I have so many different conversations about various topics, from my job, my family, my political stance and so on. When people ask me if I have any children and I say, "Yes, I have four girls," the reactions are mixed. Some people are shocked because they tell me I look like a child myself. They also can't believe I had all girls and not one boy! They ask if I'm having anymore? And last but not least, they want to know how I do it?!
I honestly don't know how I do it some days. Some days run so smoothly and others not so much. I can say that I've learned so much being a girl mom, it's all I know. Let me share five things that I've learned over my journey as a girl mom.
1. THEY ARE NOT THE SAME!
I fell into the trap of believing that since I had a daughter for seven years before I had another daughter, that they would be and act the same. I was soooooo wrong. My oldest daughter, who is 19, is my quiet, yet sarcastic child. She doesn't react too often to things but when she does, it's been building up and she explodes. Not the best case scenario, but that's how she is. She comes off as really strong and able to handle anything life throws at her but on the inside, there are people running around like those characters on Inside Out! Oh yeah, she's a lot like me. She doesn't really like showing her soft side unless she's 1000% comfortable with you.
My 11 year old and 6 year old are very similar to each other . They are very sweet and affectionate souls. Always wanting to be under me or with me. They are also very sensitive. I mean VERY sensitive. They will cry at the drop of a hat about any and everything. This took some getting used to because, like I stated before, my oldest isn't like that. But these two are. My 6 year old isn't that friendly though. She likes to sit back and peep out the scene before she does anything. My 11 year old is the life of the party and never meets a stranger. She wants to have fun and wants everyone around her to have fun too!
My 3 year old is a mixture of her sisters. She's a very strong little lady. she loves her own space and time by herself. She socializes on her own time when she feels like it. She's also sensitive as well. Loving to be under me and not wanting to share me at times with her older sisters, but when she's upset with me, she goes to them to tell. Go figure. In all of this, I had to learn that each of them have their own unique personalities and I love them for that. They still teach me things every day and I love learning from them!
2. These Girls Are EXTREMELY Intelligent!
I want to say two things here. 1. Society doesn't give women enough credit when it comes to intelligence. 2. Your children can teach you so much!
When I tell you my girls have conversations that blow my mind, they really do. I can actually sit and talk to them for hours. Their minds are so advanced. Just hearing their opinions on things going in the world is so awesome. In the words of the older generation, "They've been here before!" There are adults I know that can't hold a conversation like my girls. I love it. I'm often left speechless and evaluating my stance on certain things.
Being open minded and listening to your children is NECESSARY! Don't think that just because you're an adult, you know everything, because you absolutely DO NOT!
3. HAIR CARE!
Four girls equals a lot of hair! Fortunately my oldest does her own hair and she helps do her younger sisters hair as well. We were passed down the ability to do hair from my grandmother, which I'm extremely grateful for. I love doing hair but my girls have very thick, healthy hair. Hair days are exactly that, hair days! It takes the whole day to do their hair. I typically do styles that will last for about a week or two and that saves me. So braids and twists are my best friends!
*this little one does not like to sit still but we make it work*
We have designated wash days, which are usually on Saturdays. We wash, condition, and style. Then there's my hair. I had gone natural back in 2011 and usually would wear wigs because finding time to my hair and theirs, not happening. I finally made the decision to cut mine off and it's so much easier to manage.
4. They Are Gifts!
I've been told that once you conceive, your child has chosen you. For whatever reason, you've been blessed with a gift. I can honestly say that these girls have changed my life for the better. I'm not going to say that I was a wild child or anything growing up. I feel like I was on the right path, but moving a little slowly. These girls gave me a sense of direction. I want them to be proud of me and admire me. I know they are watching me and while I'm not perfect, I try to show them a positive example of a woman. People around me tell me all the time that I'm a great mom, my girls tell me I'm a great mom as well. I question what I'm doing and then, one of my girls will do or say something that shows me, I'm definitely doing a good job with them.
5. They Do "Boy" Things!
When people think of girls, they automatically think of dolls, dancing, and just being pretty. While this is true for my girls, they still do "boy" things. They enjoy playing in the dirt and running around getting sweaty! They play Fortnite, Grand Theft Auto, and Mortal Kombat! That's a very graphic game by the way, but I do join along! They wrestle and play with Nerf guns and make poop jokes! So it's not always glitz and glamour with these girls of mine, they can be a little rough!
So when people ask me how I do it, I don't know, I just do and I wouldn't trade it for the world!
Are you a girl mom or do you know a girl mom? Please share your experience! Until next time sending you all peace, love, and light!
Tiffany Underwood
Certified Birth and Postpartum Doula
Certified Childbirth Educator
Young Parent Support Specialist
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